Today, 22nd March 2009 @ 3:12AM…
The one question that’s bothering me for the last couple of months and bugging me for the last couple of days and killing me for the last couple of hours is “Why the hell all the good things should come to an end?”.
Everyone expects a mature behavior from tomorrow onwards from me. But where will I hide the little child’s heart. Everyone expects me to control my emotions but where will I hide the devilish commentary of mine. Everyone expects me to behave in a manner but where will I hide my natural feelings.
I had been staying in hostels for the last 8years. I was sad when I left my intermediate hostel. I was crying when I left my (yes my) NIT Jamshedpur. But today my heart is paining. When I left the last 2 previous hostels, I know that I’ll be moving to another college. I know I’ll be a student again. I know that I’ll keep in touch with all my friends. But today things are different. I’m not going to college anymore. Student life will be a distant memory from 2moro. I know most of the friends today won’t be in touch with me anymore. It’s not because I won’t call or mail them but it’s because, today I know they have their own life.
When I first entered IIM, I was praying the god to FF the days. Today it seems he listened to me for the first time I guess. I’ve been drinking lately for the past few days regularly and I hardly remember a day in the past one month I slept with my consent. Its not because I’m a drinker or because I’m a lazy crazy fellow, but because I never wanted to think about this day. Tomorrow I’ll be leaving the campus forever and I’ll be leaving my best mates eternally. I badly want to cry now. But my mind is saying be mature. I’m smiling now but there is lot of pain in the heart.
How can I forget meeting some very special people over here? I know today I’ll never meet one more meetesh, who always gladly took all my deeds in good manner. The multi talented and ever helping Sridhar won’t be there tomorrow to help me. Suresh will become a serious man from 2moro. There won’t be any more stories by Samba. My ever loving brother, Subbu, will be in Delhi fighting his own life. Where will I find a sophisticated Kalyan and a cartoon like Supriya, who on the passage of time becomes one of my best friends. Where will I learn the latest gossips when he gossip Hasini (:P) Sush will be alone. The rads, jks, shanks, jains, guptas n simrans will be a distant memory.
From tomorrow onwards I’ll be entering a new life, A life where I can’t say what I want but to say what the other person wants to listen. I can’t do what I want. A life that is full of challenges (I guess). For the last 22 years as a student I’ve faced lot of challenges. But with the company of friends I never felt that I’ve faced any challenges. But from tomorrow, I’ve to move forward on my own. It’s a tough life ahead. I don’t know whether I’m ready for it. But I can definitely say my golden days (College days) are over.
I now understood the real feeling behind the song Summer of’69.
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